Breakthrough
by goldenthyme
Summary: world w/out supernatural or ghosts. Ichigo witnessed his mother's death, but cannot remember but a few flickers. As the events of the evening come into the light, Ichigo finds himself without anything left to connect him to the living world.
1. Chapter 1

It's something I will always remember.

That June day.

With rain falling from the sky.

Like even the gods were mourning her death.

Mom is…was…everything. She was the center of our entire family. Our sun, our moon, our protector, our judge. Everyone depended on her, especially Dad.

But she's gone.

She's gone because of _me_. Because _I _ripped her out of our lives. If I had never ran down there, if that man had never taken us, if…if I hadn't existed, she would still be alive.

Dad says it wasn't because of me, that it wasn't my fault, but I've heard them. I've heard the aunts, uncles, cousins talking at the funeral, at our house. They say I am _his_ son, that I may have Mom's hair, but that I take after _him._ They never liked the fact Mom and Dad married.

_I told you so_, they say, _I told you that marriage would be the end of her._

They look at me and see a demon, a practitioner of hell that stole away their precious relative. And they're right. I caused it, and even in the end I couldn't save her. Even in the end her life was taken, though I had promised to protect her.

I should have been the one to die. She died to take my place. I'm reminded of this with every sound, with every movement.

Drip, drop.


	2. Chapter 2

Rain.

It's raining.

Again.

"Ichi-nii?"

I blink drops off my eyelashes. Yuzu and Karin are standing on the sidewalk. Dad's holding an umbrella over their heads.

"Ichi-nii? What are you doing out here?"

Did I go to school today? Huh. I can't remember. I really don't care about school anymore. I don't really care about anything. But I play the good big brother. My face moves into an expression of surprise.

"Huh! I must've lost track of time," I wonder aloud and train my eyes on my sisters. Karin gives me a blank stare, but Yuzu gives me a scolding look.

"Liar. Mom always says-" she stops suddenly and covers her mouth. My jaw quivers, and I clamp it shut. Dad shakes his head slightly. He's never this quiet. It's awkward, this seriousness, sorrow. I try to shake the feeling off and step onto the path. Yuzu glances up at my, apologetic this time. My mouth stretches. I hope it's a reassuring smile. She takes my hand, and I step under the already crowded umbrella. It's feels better, nice. But as we begin our walk home, I glance back up at the stormy sky.

Drip, drop.


	3. Chapter 3

Dad helps me change into dry clothes.

The rain's stopped. For now, at least.

Dad twitters. My cast is really wet. He's worried that we might not have another on hand. I tell him my arm doesn't hurt. It's true. Nothing hurts. I spent three days in the hospital after Mom and I were found. Multiple lacerations on the stomach and forearms, they said, and a right arm broken in three places. He's lucky that the bone didn't break the skin, they said. I told them I couldn't feel it. They said it was shock.

Still can't feel.

Dad's cutting the cast open now. He eases my arm into a sling.

"It has to do for now," he says. There are dark circles around his eyes. He hasn't slept.

"Well! Can't have you looking bad, can we? The girls won't be flocking around you if that happens!" He's trying to joke around like normal, but it seems forced.

The phone rings. Probably a neighbor offering condolences. Or one of Mom's family, which would be much less pleasant. Dad leaves to get it.

The rain's stopped, but some stray droplets spray down on the roof from the trees.

Drip, drop.


	4. Chapter 4

The police are here again.

They came the second day I was in the hospital. Somehow Dad managed to get them to go away, saying I was resting.

Dad hasn't slept much, but I've slept less.

He tried to stop them again. Dad, that is. They came in anyways, asking questions.

What happened? Who did it? Where were we held? What did the culprit do while he held us?

I stare into space. I don't want to answer them. They look frustrated. One is fuming, saying things under his breath. The other is noting things down. They can't get too angry. I'm a child.

The last of them, the calmer one, is just looking. Judging. What does he think?

The questions are coming again, faster.

In reality I'm sitting politely, choosing not to answer. In my head I curl up into a ball, turning inside myself.

I hear chairs scooting back. Dad's ushering them out.

The sky is clear and sunny, but I still hear the rain, softly drumming.

Drip, drop.


	5. Chapter 5

"Big brother?" Yuzu is standing beside my bed.

"Are you sick, big brother?"

It's been two months since the funeral. The detectives had kept coming for several days after the first visit. I finally spoke to them in the most recent one. They kept pushing, but I told them that I really didn't know much.

"Big brother?"

"Yuzu," I snap, "I just want to sleep."

She looks shocked. I immediately feel bad and hug her.

"I'm sorry," I say. "It's been rough."

She surprises me by smiling. I thought for sure that she'd be more upset.

"You've been making only sad faces," she mused. "Now it's different."

I blink. She's only four, but often seemed to know more than even me.

When she leaves the room, I make a resolution. A resolution to move on. A resolution I plan to keep.

There's no rain, but I can hear it pounding on the roof, drip after drip.

But this time I tune it out.

* * *

Hey everyone! Goldenthyme here!

Just so you know, this is far from the end of the fic. If anything, this is more like a prologue or backstory to what will take place.

I originally started writing this as something for Ichigo and Orihime, but I changed my mind recently. It will progress like originally planned, but with some definite differences. Rukia will be making an appearance, but not as a shinigami. Orihime and Tatsuki will have roles as well. Orihime will serve as a love interest, but there will be a lot with Rukia as well.

The basic design of this will not change. It's not a pairing fic, and it's not going to go much of anywhere near canon.

I hope you have fun reading! The next chapter will take place six years later in his first year of high school.


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